Success, am I really self sabotaging? #An exploration

We can be resistant to abundance, love, and success through self sabotage. Why?

Success can bring up lots of fear. Fear can not only create a kind of frozen in the head lights syndrome, it can also bring up feelings of failure, total overwhelm and a deep feelings of vulnerability. The inner critic or what is commonly referred to as the ego can wake up and feel threatened, by change. The egos job is to protect itself. It will question you, it may ask

Who do you think you are?

It won’t work out?

You won’t know what to say?

Your not good enough

Or maybe you have imposter syndrome and you don’t feel your qualified.

It seems contradictory, if we actively manifested something we desired why do we feel unsure and start self sabotaging?

I’ve done this lots of times, I get a client but then the doubt creeps in, who am I to give reading? Come on you’ll freeze and you won’t know what to say or get any insight? So I’ve cancelled, why? I’m more than able to do it. (I’m still working on this one btw)

The big question is what can we do? Firstly we can show compassion and tenderness towards ourself when these feelings arise. I’ve been told I give to others and I encourage them but I can neglect myself just think of what more I can achieve if I showed more self-belief and compassion towards myself, imagine!

More importantly how do you do this? Begin with positive self talk, imagine your talking to a friend who is feeling worried. You would be kind, and understanding and tell them it’s understandable you feel worried or you’d use encouraging words.

You can journal and write about your fear. This method is safe and allows you to explore these feels without divulging anything to anyone else. To begin, what is your fear or what is your concern. I simply simply ask why? and I write an answer, for example it won’t work, write, why won’t it work? Carry on answering each question until you can’t think of another response. This exercise is very empowering, you are finding the answers to your questions and the solutions.

Remember you are mind reading, trying to predict the outcome, this is your ego and anxiety, and is not a true reflection of the outcome. You’re judging yourself and the outcome before it’s happened. This can then become a great barrier, a key ingredient of self sabotage.

Push away those negative beliefs babe

Often when we are at a point of transition, or a big change we feel scared, vulnerable and many, many more feelings and doubt. This is often a sign it’s the right choice.

Can I handle it? Great question, I believe the our guides or god depending on what you believe only send us what we can truly handle. When you pass your driving test, yes you can drive but you only really gain confidence and self assurance with practice. I feel it’s the same when you start a new venture, job, relationship, business or whatever you have called into your life. You can’t expect to be a master straight away. You can’t expect everything to be perfect. It’s ok to be a take it slowly, it’s ok to learn from mistakes.

I was nervous about writing on a blog, because I was being very vulnerable and leaving myself open to criticism. I finally took the plunge in 2018, I TRULY love the creative process. I don’t write very often but I’m ok with that, quantity was wasn’t my objective, I simply wanted to get going.

I write in a journal, I write what I’m grateful for or I write notes of thoughts and ideas which come at odd times, on my phone. Personally for me it was starting the creative process, this was my starting point.

When you do manifest what you desire own it, honour it and be thankful for this great gift. Enjoy what you’ve manifested and thank the universe . When a child succeeds we get so excited and we encourage their achievement with such joy. Do this when you achieve what you desired. I’m not saying high five yourself, well you can but metaphorically speaking.

When we raise our vibration we become magnets and our energy radiates out into the world.

Affirmations are deeply powerful, the one below is the first one I used. It’s very powerful and can be used to quieten anxiety gremlins. Another useful one is “I am worthy”

I let go of all self-judgement and self-sabotage.

I’m very aware of this and it’s my own resistance because I don’t always believe in myself. Upon reflection, I’ve discovered when I think too much about something I hesitate and the doubt appears. When I just go for it without too much ”what if projection” It’s a much easier process.

The main emotion that is behind these questions is fear. This can often arise with change in our life. It’s ok to feel scared.

Another tool, if you are attuned to reiki, you can clear emotional blocks reiki through a self treatment or write down your desires and use the Cho Ko Rei symbol, which adds extra power and energy.

In my Reiki Level 1 course you will learn Reiki releases emotional wounds, increases the vibrational frequency of the body and helps change negative conditioning & behaviour. If you are interested you can learn reiki online.

Use the contact form below and enquire about personalised courses.

I personally use some of the above strategies to manage my self-doubt, it’s still very much a work in progress. After all, we are forever learning and growing.

What the f@&k waiting? Just do it ✨

Love JP x


Published by Janine Petty

Hi I’m Janine I make hand poured soy wax candles, I’m a reiki healer, vibe queen, card reader and all round spiritual entrepreneur. Graves disease fighter, depression and anxiety sufferer.

2 thoughts on “Success, am I really self sabotaging? #An exploration

    1. I started writing this a few months ago. I continued last night, I just couldn’t sleep so I write more and added details. Well I was thinking we could try it over zoom it’s an app like Skype. You can do it online


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: